It was early evening when we arrived at the Macedonian border town of Tetovo. We disembarked and made our way into the station. We found the ticket office and bought three tickets to Skopje, the capital of Macedonia. Having refused to use the toilet on the bus, Catz was bursting for the loo and made his way to the station toilets. Danny went about his usual snack related business and got chatting to the shop owner. Meanwhile, little be known to us, Catz had attracted the attention of yet another station dwelling weirdo. Guarding the loos was a tall, skinny man with funny teeth. Catz re-emerged from the toilets, closely followed by his new found friend. "Who's that?" stammered Danny. "Elvis" replied Catz." "Where did he come from" said Danny. "He was guarding the loos. He gave me some funny white powder to use as soap" said Catz, shrugging his shoulders. Danny and I stifled our laughter and sidled away from Catz and his latest station companion. Elvis was trying to make conversation with Catz, repeating his name and pointing back towards the toilets. Catz adopted a different approach towards Elvis than he had done with the other station weirdo’s, indulging him in conversation and the attention he so obviously craved. This almost backfired when Elvis tried hugging Catz and it was only the arrival of the bus to Skopje that saved Catz any more embarrassment.
The bus ride to Skopje took little over an hour. Luckily, the stop we chose to get off at was not far from the train station. Danny and Catz withdrew some Macedonian Denar, whilst I sought out a currency exchange booth. As I was changing my money, Danny and Catz were getting harassed by a taxi driver. Little did this guy know, he was dealing with Catz - a man well experienced in dealing with unwanted attention. This guy even followed us out to the car park, only giving up on us when we found a rival taxi. The taxi took us to Hostel Hostel, a rather drab affair. The foam mattresses offered little enticement to sleep, and so after the obligatory shower, we headed out into the city in search of some much needed food and perhaps a beer or two.
As we made our way through the grey communist era housing blocks, our expectations of a good night out were low. We were surprised then to find the city centre buzzing with street entertainment. We found a fast food outlet (that also served cold beer) and settled down for our first cold one of the evening. Sitting outside, Catz and Danny ordered a “Wiggi” Burger meal, whilst I opted for a pizza. As we sat eating our food we were approached by a scruffy boy, no more than 8 years old. Upon giving him a slice of pizza his eyes lit up and he went running back to his friends, devouring the pizza in seconds.
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Catz waiting for his Wiggy burger |
Ise enjoying a can of Macedonian beer |
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Our stomachs full, we pressed on, eager for our second drink of the night. We were soon ordering cocktails at a swanky outdoor bar. Two cocktails each and a big wad of Macedonian notes later and we were on the move again. Our third bar of the night was yet another cocktail bar. The cocktails were diminutive in size, and we weren’t impressed. Keen to make up for this blatant exploitation, I spied an old man selling drinks from a small roadside stall. I bought a can of beer and drunk it, admittedly with some hesitancy, not knowing the Macedonian laws for drinking on the streets. Leaving the comfort of our sofas, we approached a large circle of people. Swilling my second can of beer, I sat down to watch the performance. Some guy in a blue robe and red hat, with a whistle in his mouth needed a volunteer. Catz started edging away. It was no use though. Catz was officially a weirdo magnet and before he knew it was on the ground entwined with this crazy street performer. |
 Danny shows his disgust at the size of his...cock...tail |
 Ise perks up once he has discovered a cheap source of alcohol |
 Catz attracts his second wierdo of the day |
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At this point Catz decided to take his leave. His Wiggi Burger was about to make a violent and untimely exit from his body. Danny and I were keen to prolong the night and hailed down a taxi. Through the use of hand motions, we managed to explain that we wanted somewhere to drink. We sped through the back streets of Macedonia, arriving at Pub England. As far as I could tell, we were the only English people in Pub England. We ordered a beer and managed to get our photos taken with the Macedonian flag. Spirits high, I left Danny at the bar to go to the loo. As I made my way back through the crowded bar, a bald man stood up and walked towards me. Confrontation really was not an option. “Where are you from?” he asked. “England" I replied. Was he chatting me up ? The girl he was with smiled. He went on to explain that he had lost a bet. He had bet I was Scandinavian (apparently because I had a beard). As he had lost the bet, he offered to buy me a beer, which I gratefully accepted. Sitting down with my new Macedonian friends, we started chatting about my travels. “Where are your friends” they eventually asked. “Shit”. I had forgotten about Danny. Standing up, I looked over towards the bar. There was Danny, busying himself with the Macedonian flag. I caught his eye and waved him over. Danny's immidiate reaction was that of fear. The obvious conclusion he had come to was that I had got myself into a fight and he was anticipating having to throw some punches (or more likely try and talk his way out of trouble). Danny was both relieved and surprised to find that my companions were friendly and eagerly pulled up a seat. |
 Danny in Pub England with the Macedonian Flag |
 This chap bought me a beer having lost a bet that I was Scandanavian |
 Chatting with the locals in Pub England |
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An unknown number on pints later and we suddenly found ourselves in a bleak car park at 4 am. Thankfully, remembering the name of our hostel (Hostel Hostel) wasn’t a problem, and we managed to flag down a taxi. However, we made the school boy error of not negotiating a fare. We had a very near miss on the way back to the hostel, narrowly avoiding an oncoming car. Upon reaching Hostel Hostel the driver demanded a ridiculous amount of money from us. I initially refused to pay him, but the driver became increasingly irate, so much so, that Danny handed him a wad of cash and legged it, thankful to escape in one piece. We both collapsed on our foam mattresses, keen to get a few hours kip, before our train journey to Bulgaria in the morning. Next (Bulgaria) |
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